Cemetery Headstone Requirements

Last verified: September 14, 2026

The short answer

Cemeteries set their own rules about markers, and those rules can differ section by section within one cemetery. Before you order anything, ask your cemetery what is permitted at your specific grave, and get the answer in writing.

The Federal Trade Commission's consumer guidance confirms cemeteries vary in "the type of monuments or memorials it allows," and the nonprofit Funeral Consumers Alliance notes that a cemetery can limit "the type and size of monuments that are allowed, since the cemetery can refuse to accept one deemed inappropriate."

This page gives you the questions. It does not — and cannot — give you the answers.

Why we will not tell you your cemetery's rules

There are well over a hundred thousand burial grounds in the United States, run by municipalities, religious bodies, private companies, family associations and volunteers. Their rules are not published in any central register, they change, and they vary within a single cemetery.

So any page claiming to tell you "the cemetery rules" is telling you about cemeteries in general, which is not the thing you need. We deliberately do not maintain a database of cemetery regulations, and we never present general guidance as any cemetery's rule. Monument companies quoting your project should also review the requirements that apply — but the authoritative answer comes from your cemetery, and getting it is worth an afternoon.

Who to ask

• The cemetery office, for anything about what is permitted, what it charges, and what approval it requires. In a small or volunteer-run cemetery this may be a township clerk, a church office, or a trustee.
• The person who holds the interment right for the grave — often a family member — because their authorisation is usually needed before a marker can be placed.
• The monument company, once you know the rules, for what can be built within them.

If you are not sure which cemetery, or need its address to begin, our cemetery directory can help you locate it.

The questions to ask — a checklist

Print this and take it to the call. Write the answers down, with the date and the name of the person who gave them.

About the grave and your right to mark it

• [ ] Who holds the interment right or deed for this grave?
• [ ] What do you need from me to show I am authorised to place a marker?
• [ ] What is the section, lot and grave identification I should give a monument company?

About what is permitted

• [ ] What marker styles are allowed at this grave — upright, flat, slant, bevel, ledger, bench?
• [ ] What are the maximum dimensions, including thickness and base size?
• [ ] Are there restrictions on material, colour or finish?
• [ ] Are vases permitted? Attached or separate? How many?
• [ ] Are photographs or portrait plaques permitted? Any restrictions on how they are mounted?
• [ ] Are there restrictions on inscriptions, symbols or emblems?
• [ ] Do any of these rules differ in this particular section?

About the foundation and setting

• [ ] Is a concrete foundation required for this marker?
• [ ] Does a foundation already exist at this grave?
• [ ] Who pours the foundation — the cemetery or the monument company?
• [ ] Who sets the marker, and are outside monument companies allowed to work on the grounds?
• [ ] Do you require proof of insurance from the monument company?
• [ ] Are there times of year when setting work is not done here?

About charges

• [ ] What does the cemetery charge for a foundation?
• [ ] What does the cemetery charge to set a marker?
• [ ] Is there a permit, application or inspection fee?
• [ ] Is there anything else billed by the cemetery in connection with a marker?
• [ ] Am I required to buy the marker from the cemetery?

About approval and timing

• [ ] Does the design have to be approved before it is made?
• [ ] What do you need to see — a drawing, dimensions, the inscription?
• [ ] Who approves it, and how long does that usually take?
• [ ] Will you put the approval in writing?

What a written approval should contain

A verbal yes is not something you can rely on months later when a stone arrives. Ask for written confirmation that records:

• The cemetery's name, and the section, lot and grave the approval covers.
• The marker style, and the exact dimensions approved, including the base.
• The material, colour and finish.
• Any accessories approved — vases, photo plaque, emblems — and their sizes.
• Whether the foundation is required, who pours it, and what it costs.
• Who sets the marker, and what the cemetery charges to do so.
• Any fees payable to the cemetery, itemised.
• The date, and the name and role of the person granting approval.
• Any expiry — if the approval lapses after a period, you want to know now.

Keep a copy, and give a copy to your monument company.

The charges to ask about

The FTC's guidance on buying a cemetery site is a useful reminder that cemetery billing is made of separate items. It notes that cemeteries have "charges — usually hundreds of dollars — to open a grave for interment and additional charges to fill it in"; that "most, but not all, cemeteries require you to purchase a grave liner, which will cost several hundred dollars"; and that you should "look for a separate endowment care fee for maintenance and groundskeeping." It also advises that perpetual care "sometimes is included in the purchase price, but it's important to clarify that point before you buy the site or service."

Some of those relate to the burial rather than the marker — but they arrive on the same family in the same season, so it is worth knowing which are already paid.

For the marker itself, the charges that most often surprise families are the foundation and the setting fee, because they frequently come from the cemetery rather than from the monument company whose quote you are reading. How they fit into the total is covered in how much a headstone costs. We do not publish dollar amounts for cemetery fees, because every cemetery sets its own.

The Funeral Consumers Alliance also records two practices worth asking about directly: some cemeteries "can insist that the customer buy the headstone from them," and some "impose a ludicrous 'inspection fee' for markers purchased elsewhere." Better to learn that before you shop.

What the FTC Funeral Rule does and does not cover

A claim circulates online that federal law guarantees your right to buy a monument from whomever you like. That is not what the FTC Funeral Rule says about its own scope.

In the FTC's words, "The Rule does not apply to third-party sellers, such as casket and monument dealers, or to cemeteries that lack an on-site funeral home."

The Rule's well-known outside-purchase protection is about caskets and urns at funeral homes: "The funeral provider cannot refuse to handle a casket or urn you bought online, at a local casket store, or somewhere else — or charge you a fee to do it." That protection is not stated to extend to monuments, and the Funeral Consumers Alliance makes the same point from the consumer side, noting that "no federal regulations give cemetery customers the right to buy only the services and merchandise they want."

What that means in practice: whether you can buy your marker from an independent monument company is generally a question of your state's law and your cemetery's own policy — not of this federal rule. Many cemeteries do permit outside purchase. Some do not. Ask.

This is a description of what a federal rule says about its own scope, taken from the regulator's own consumer page. It is not legal advice, and it is not a statement about the law in your state. If a cemetery's requirement seems unlawful or unreasonable to you, consult a qualified attorney or your state's consumer protection office. The FTC pages cited here are dated July 2012; we re-checked them on September 14, 2026.

If your design is rejected

It happens, and it is usually recoverable.

1. Ask exactly which requirement the design fails, and by how much. "Too large" is not actionable; "three inches over the section maximum height" is.
2. Get it in writing, with the rule referenced.
3. Take it to your monument company. Most rejections are dimensional or material, and a company that works in your area may know the fix immediately.
4. Ask whether an exception is possible, and who decides. Some cemeteries have a process; some do not.
5. Check what you have already paid, and what the monument company's terms say about a design that cannot be approved. This is one reason to get approval before ordering.

If you are comparing quotes on this marketplace and a layout or requirement issue comes up, a monument company can propose a revised configuration, and you are free to decline it and go back to the other quotes you received.

If the rules seem to have changed

Families often find the rules are stricter than when the plot was bought decades ago. Ask the cemetery whether older graves are treated differently, whether the change is documented, and whether there is an appeal or exception process. Ask for the current rules in writing regardless — that document is what your monument company will work to.

Frequently asked questions

Do I always need the cemetery's permission? Assume yes until told otherwise, and get it in writing. Cemeteries can refuse a marker they consider inappropriate.

What is a setting fee? The charge for placing the marker at the grave. It is often billed by the cemetery rather than by the monument company, and it is not always included in a monument quote. Ask both parties.

Can a cemetery require me to buy my headstone from them? Some do. Whether they may is a matter of state law and their own policy, not of the FTC Funeral Rule. Ask the cemetery directly.

How long does approval take? It varies widely — a same-day counter decision in some places, a committee meeting in others. Ask when you ask everything else.

Do you keep a list of cemetery rules? No, deliberately. Rules change and vary by section; a stored copy would go stale and mislead. We help you locate the cemetery and give you the questions.